Love Letters

During the latter part of our dating "career" N was at home in New Brunswick, Canada and I in Ethiopia. Long before mobile phones and internet hit the rural areas of Ethio, N and I were snail mailing it (Seriously, I still find it strange to be in a taxi with an Ethiopian grandma and her chickens, only to hear her mobile ring and her answer with a "a bait"). I have boxes and boxes of letters that we sent to each other during that time. Some are funny, some are depressing, and all speak of our love for each other and our longing to be together again (ok, you can stop reading if you are grossed out!). I often miss sending those kinds of letters to each other. Now we text message, facebook and e-mail and as of late, leave post-its on the mirror for each other. Those are all good and fine, but there is something about the written word that just feels very intimate.

Tonight we are tasked with our most important love letter. We have until tomorrow at 3:00pm to come up with a letter and photo for Y. We aren't so good with the picture taking, but our friend took the above photo last week and it is good enough! I'm not sure what one says to a three year old who has had her life turned upside down in the last few months with our comings and goings and her move to a new place. Of course we will tell her that we love her and miss her, but what does that mean to a three year old who can only see us through a picture?

We are longing for the time when we are together and we can care for her. And we can love her forever. And we can be her family in a real and tangible way.

$174.30 Chicago/Albuquerque

Seeing my nephews and niece and their AMAZING mother for the first time in almost a year: priceless.

August 1st 2009: May you come quickly.

The Joy of Cleaning (Bon Voyage N)

It's confession time: I don't clean the house. I used to pretend that I did, but now I am readily admitting that N does all of the housekeeping. Maybe I've done laundry, say, twice in the last six years. Dishes? Hardly. Toilet bowl washing? Forget about it.
I know, I know.
How lucky am I, right? Well, N left for Ethiopia today and here I sit wondering how I will learn to do the tasks that I have gotten out of for most of my life. I have historical roots in uncleanliness and have always somehow had some nice soul willing to assist me in my task. Here's a look at how I have gotten out of the housework for the last 29 years:

1980-1998: My mother really likes things clean. Too bad for her, I take after my father. From my long pointy noses to my love for food, I just didn't get my mother's genes or cleaning skills. Lucky for me, my moms desire for a clean house was equally matched with my desire to trick my younger sister into doing anything I wanted. Voila! Clean room! (And it usually only cost me a piece of candy or something).

1998-2002: College. Let's just say that my roommates liked me for my personality and NOT my ability to keep our living space in tip-top shape. I wised up and got a single room so that I could live judgement free. I do think that I had a college wide reputation for living in a total pit. This is when I realized that I could use my cooking skills to get people to forget about my other domestic failings. From marinara sauce to spinach dip, I whipped up culinary delights in the dorm kitchen and people always helped me clean my room so that we could all dine together. Another successful diversion...

2002-2003: Ethiopia. Working in Bonga Refugee Camp. It was hot as hell. I was teaching for the first time, overwhelmed with life without electricity, running water and living in a roach and sometimes rat infested home. Enter 'Monkite. Her name means "no soup" which described the condition of her family when she was born. She wanted a job and allegedly liked washing dishes. For a salary that is less than I spend on tortilla chips in a week, 'Monkite scrubbed my dishes until they shined as much as they ever would. (The decision to have a housekeeper while living in rural Ethiopia was a struggle to come to, but ultimately something that I would do again. More on that later).

2003-Present: Marriage. Aaghh.....wedded bliss, right? I always told N that I was messy. He swore before we lived together that he didn't mind. We got married in September and he would start grad school in Jan. Without a green card or work authorization, his time filling prospects were pretty bleak (Let's not engage the deeper issues of my potential power over him )Thus his role as domestic manager as I worked to pay the bills. Well, our roles stuck, and the rest is history. Not to say that he actually enjoys the role. I sure do, but his feelings are not as loving as mine. (He is in DC now and has ample time to form a rebuttal before his next flight takes off).

Today: Me, a sponge, some kind of all natural spray and the bathtub. Cross your fingers for a successful five weeks. The good news is that kid sister (now 25 years old and a law student) is back for the summer living in the back room. I plan to entice her with something that she doesn't know how to cook and tell her that I will give it to her if she cleans the tile. After all, it's worked for the last 29 years, why not now?

All this to say, N will be deeply missed for many reasons, including his mad house keeping skills (including coffee roasting). Enjoy this super cheesy photo of him looking demon possessed as he browns our beans to perfection!

Weekend Update

Busy times around here! But not the kind of busy that we have become overly accustomed to. You know, the not fun kind of busy: work, school, sleep and no play. Nope! Not us, not now! We have left that kind of busyness in the dust for a summer of serious fun! I actually can't remember N and I ever having so much spontaneous fun. This week (give a couple of days) has included outdoor music fun with friends, Ethiopian soccer game, late night trip for coffee with friends, a too late night at a dive bar, more Ethiopian soccer, and then some more, two meals of injera, a family reunion, thoughts of visiting Michael Jackson's house while driving through Indiana, house guests and BBQ's. It just feels so nice. We are both still working (N will finish teaching the first section of summer school this week), but it does us both well to have a rest from being in school.

The spontaneous fun as a union will end in a few days as we part ways for "Part II" of Summer 2009. N is off to Addis for five weeks to continue with language, work at the orphanage and see Y (who we hear is growing bigger everyday and is still the "queen" per reports when we phone the Sisters). I will continue on with 4 more weeks of programming with work and then a break when N returns. Any suggestions on vacations spots?

Perhaps a highlight for the week was a chance to truly practice Amharic with a 78 year old gentlemen. I say "truly" because my friends always provide me with the wonderful out of using English to fall back on when I forget words/or never knew it to begin with! We went for a meal/coffee at a new friends house only to discover that she had not yet returned from work. Her father opened the door and immediately greeted us in Amharic and launched into a super long monologue. He was thankful to have someone to speak with and got a kick out of an American/Canadian duo attempting to navigate the lingo. I'm blaming some of the initial language confusion on the fact that his first language is Tigrinya. Man, it was tough. I would say that the two of us managed to understand and contribute fairly well, but it required conversation skills that I have not used in months and maybe even a year. We talked government, adjustment to life in America, growing old and the chill of Chicago winters. Thankfully, our friend came home after about 20 mins. Wonderful practice for us and a fun chance to interact with a generation that often does not immigrate to the US.

That's all for now! Peace out!
PS: With all of this fun, guess what I haven't been doing? Ummm maybe exercising and eating "right." Maybe a few too many tortilla chips and not enough Bikram and running. Tomorrow, right?